Tag: Sports

Hockey Stars and Their Other Jobs

So Tim Horton founded Canada’s most successful franchise. Big deal—did he ever record a disco album? Here are some hockey palyers and their other jobs from the brand-new Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader Weird Canada.

hockey players other jobsWAYNE GRETZKY. In 1991, NBC TV briefly aired ProStars, a Saturday morning cartoon starring three big sports stars of the era: Michael Jordan, Bo Jackson, and Gretzky. The cartoon versions of the sports stars had superpowers and a distinct personality, and in every episode the trio would defeat a supervillain, mad scientist, or as they did in one case, recover the stolen Stanley Cup. Gretzky, for some reason, was the jokester of the group and was obsessed with eating. The real Gretzky appeared in live-action bumpers at the beginning and end of the show—voice actor Townsend Coleman performed Gretzky’s voice in the animated sequences.

GUY LAFLEUER. At the height of Lafleuer’s career and popularity in 1979—he’d just won four straight Stanley Cups with the Montreal Canadiens—Lafleuer recorded an album called Lafleuer. It’s where Lafleuer’s strengths and the trappings of the era collide. It’s an album of hockey-themed songs by anonymous studio musicians, as well as monologues of hockey instructional tips from LaFleuer…set to a thumping disco beat. Side one contains six songs: “Skating,” “Checking,” “Power Play,” an extended dance version of “Power Play,” “Shooting,” and “Scoring. Side two: all of the same songs, but in French.

Team Name Changes

To celebrate the launch of a new NFL season, here is a sneak peek into our newest title with a sports-themed story about team name changes throughout history. Story will soon appear in Uncle John’s Perpetually Pleasing Bathroom Reader.

 

Name Changers

Meet the new team, same as the old team—just with a different name.

Team Name ChangesNew York Titans

The Tennessee Titans weren’t the first Titans in pro football. the first were the New York Titans, a charter member of the American Football League (later absorbed by the NFL) in 1960. The name was a wry reference to the New York Giants of the NFL—in mythology, titans are bigger, stronger, and tougher than giants. the name only lasted for three years. By then the team was playing in brand-new Shea Stadium, located directly beneath the flight paths of two major airports, LaGuardia and JFK, hence the new Jets. (It also rhymed with the name of Shea Stadium’s other team, baseball’s New York Mets.)

Weird Invention: The Hovercraft Golf Cart

The new golf carts at a course in Ohio are a bit different than the old ones—for one thing, they fly.

Hovercraft Golf CartMost golfers dread hitting a water hazard, or hate to maneuver their golf carts around sand traps and other obstacles. But not the golfers at the Windy Knoll Golf Club in Springfield, Ohio. This summer, the course is unveiling two new hovercraft golf carts for their customers to use instead of the more conventional golf carts.

Windy Knoll will become the first course in America to offer BW1 Hovercraft Golf Carts. After seeing a video of PGA tour veteran (and 2012 Masters champion) Bubba Watson buzzing around in a prototype, the club’s management decided that hovercrafts were the future of golf, and that the future is now.

Famous For Fifteen Minutes: Grand Canyon Stunts

There’s something about America’s biggest hole in the ground that seems to lure thrill-seekers into believing that they simply must risk their lives and navigate it somehow. In June, seventh-generation tightrope walker Nik Wallenda successfully walked over the Grand Canyon on a two-inch-wide cable, without a safety harness or net while the Colorado River roared thousands of feet below him. (And all on live TV.)

grand canyon stunts

Here are two more possibly less-than-sane individuals and their death-defying Grand Canyon stunts.

Nice Stories: Play Ball!

Cory Hahn drafted by Arizona Diamondbacks

Cory Hahn could have been a professional baseball player right out of high school. In 2010, at Mater Dei High in Santa Ana, California, he had a .411 batting average and also pitched a 14-1 record. He was also named “Mr. Baseball,” as the state’s best high school player of the year.

But Hahn skipped going pro in favor of a college education, a lifelong goal. He attended Arizona State, and joined the baseball team there. Tragically, in just his second game with the team in 2011, he collided with the second basemen while trying to steal second base and suffered a spinal injury that left him paralyzed from the waist down.

That was the end of Hahn’s baseball career, but not the end of his baseball story. In early June, Major League Baseball had its annual player draft. With the 1,020th overall pick, in the 34th round, the Arizona Diamondbacks drafted Hahn. It’s significant not just for the Arizona connection, but because Hahn wore #34 at Arizona State. And while it may have been a nice gesture, it wasn’t an empty gesture. Diamondbacks president Derrick Hall promised Hahn a job in the team’s front office or as a talent scout, should he want it, upon his graduation.

Best Golf Book EVER

Masters UPDATE: Adam Scott – WHAT. A. PUTT. Wow.

And now holy cow, Angel Cabrera. What a finish coming up…

Congratulations, Adam Scott and Australia! Wow! What a finish! (And Angel Cabrera – you are a class act. Nicely done! And very nice of Scott to give a nod to the Shark. All around very nice day of golf.)
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Hey, did you know you can get your favorite golf fan the best book on golf ever made! No, not that one – this one!

Check out this review at Amazon:

Every year for Christmas, I get my husband an Uncle John Bathroom Reader – as the throne room IS his favorite place to read. He is a golfer, too. THIS book has to be one of the funniest since the laughter floating out the bathroom door was just plain fun to listen too. Later on or days later on the golf course, he would be sharing the stories he read and the laughter would begin again.

This year, I gave him a new padded toilet seat for his throne and 3 Uncle John Readers! I do believe it was one of the best choices I’ve ever made as far as gifts go…especially on the grin and giggle meter!! Thanks, Amazon for having the best choices.

And it’s not just humor, check out this sample:

Gill Communication? 3 Weird Fishing Techniques

fishing techniques
Some guy with a really BIG fish.

Fishing is definitely not for the impatient, especially during winter. Have you ever tried ice fishing? It’s fun…if you enjoy sitting in a frosty shack while waiting for a nibble that may never come. Naturally, many fishermen have tried to take the tedium out of angling. The following three fishing techniques will certainly increase your chances of a big catch.

Giveaway: Super Bowl XLVI Gift Pack

It is time to prepare for the Super Bowl again. While we are still not sure which teams will be playing in the big game, we all know that Super Bowl XLVI will be played in Indianapolis and there will lots of parties. To help you prepare for the big day, we are giving away a book gift packet complete with The NFL’s Top 100, a cookbook with mouth-watering recipes, a pictorial history of Indianapolis, and of course, Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader Sports Spectacular.

NFL Drug Scandal Coming? [updated5]

FYI, sports fans: There could be a big story concerning the National Football League breaking pretty soon:

Chicago Bears wide receiver Sam Hurd was locked up in federal custody Thursday as his stunned teammates learned he had been charged with trying to set up a drug-dealing network following his arrest with more than a pound of cocaine.

A POUND of cocaine. That’s not your “personal-use” amount of cocaine, as the story implies with the “network” comment. And the dude just signed a three-year contract worth $5.15 million! Why on earth…?! Wow.

But for the REALLY big ingredient in this story we have to go to another site:

Bears wide receiver Sam Hurd, who was arrested Wednesday on federal drug charges, was a top drug dealer in Chicago and police have a list of NFL players who were supplied drugs by the receiver, a law enforcement source told 670 The Score.

Oh. Dear. This is really, really ungood for the NFL.

UPDATED: Crash Un-Paralyzes Paralyzed Paralympic Star

UPDATE, 8 OCTOBER 2012: It has just been brought to our attention that this story is a hoax. Ugh.

An April 2012 ABCNews story on fake handicaps in sports for the disabled contains these paragraphs:

The Dutch handbiker Monique van der Vorst had won two silver medals in the 2008 Paralympics. But after that she suddenly experienced a seemingly miraculous recovery. In the summer of 2010, she claimed that she had regained sensation in her legs after 13 years in a wheelchair. Since then, she said, she could stand up, walk and even ride a racing bike again.

Now Van der Vorst has had to admit that she was also able to stand and walk during her career as a paraplegic handbiker. Former competitors and neighbors had reported often seeing the athlete outside of her wheelchair — taking a shower, or even dancing. Van der Vorst was a sports celebrity in the Netherlands, and now everyone is outraged. The newspapers are calling it a “scam” and a “lie.”

Update over.

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And in what is without question a candidate for the most amazing story of the year, last year, next year, and possibly every other year ever – she’s now in training to go to the regular old Olympics in 2016. Because just coming un-paralyzed? Boring!

98-year-old Gets 10th-degree Judo Blackbelt

Impressive:

Just two years before her 100th birthday, Sensei Keiko Fukuda has  become the first woman to achievea tenth-degree black belt—the highest rank in the martial art and combat sport Judo. Fukuda is now one of only four living people who’ve earned the tenth-degree (or dan) black belt. To put the accomplishment into better perspective, throughout history, only sixteen people have ever achieved this honor.

RIP Macho Man

Pro wrestling legend Randy ‘Macho Man’ Savage has died:

“Professional wrestling and the entertainment community in general has lost a legend.

Randall Mario Poffo, better known to the world as Randy “Macho Man” Savage, died today after reportedly crashing his car into a tree subsequent losing control of the vehicle. His wife also was in the car, but only suffered minor injuries. He was a young 58 years old.”

Fellow wrestler Dusty Rhodes:

“There’s probably five or six of us, with Andre (the Giant) and (Hulk) Hogan and thankfully myself and (Ric) Flair, that, when their names pop up, even if you’re not a fan, you know who in the hell these people are,” Rhodes said.

High school baseball coach (Savage was a minor  league baseballl player before he was a wrestler):

Miracle on Ice: Where are They Now?

Three days ago the Men’s U.S. Olympic Hockey team got an unexpected win over heavily favored Canada, the first time the Americans have beaten the Canadians in an Olympics since 1960. MSNBC got 8.22 million viewers for the Sunday afternoon broadcast—the second highest total in the network’s history. (Only election night 2008 got more.) Congratulations to the U.S. team, and good luck for the rest of the tournament to both the U.S. and Canada.

The game came just a day short of the 30th anniversary of what is arguably the biggest moment in U.S. sports history, the “Miracle on Ice” that saw the Americans beat the Russians, winner of the gold in the four previous Olympics, on their own way to winning gold at the 1980 games in Lake Placid, New York. In Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader Plunges into Minnesota (2006), we covered the “Miracle on Ice” story—and looked into where some of the players and coaches are today. Here’s an excerpt (with updates!)

The Blind Zimbabwean Cricket Commentator

File this story under “amazing”:

When the ball hits the bat, the radio announcer exclaims that it’s sailing far. Dean Du Plessis’ acute sense of hearing and his eavesdropping on other commentators helps him overcome the fact that he is blind, producing a delivery so polished that most listeners are unaware that he can’t see.

Mr Du Plessis hears the power and direction of the hit. He listens to the speed and spin of the ball, along with the players’ exertions and their cries of elation or frustration. He senses the excitement – or otherwise – of the play on the cricket field and collates the scores with a computer-like memory.

Congratulations, Ryder Cup Teams

The Americans made a heck of a comeback today, and it came down to the final holes of the finals singles match—but the European team held on for the win – 14-1/2 to 13-1/2. Congrats, Europe, and well played, Americans. What a tournament.

If you’re wondering who Ryder is and why everyone seems to want his cup—we did the history in Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader Tee’s Off on Golf (page 223).

Here’s an excerpt:

Brits and Yanks
The Ryder Cup is the biennial competition between the best professional American and European golfers. They play for no prize money, but simply for the chance to win the cup, which they then get to keep for two years. Its popularity has gone up and down through the decades, but reached a new high in the 1990s, thanks to some excellent play—and a growing rivalry between the two teams.

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