A Sunday reading selection, from UJ’s HEAVY DUTY BR (page  355). Click on pages to enlarge, click again to really zoom in:

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Please allow us to dedicate this humble little blog post to our newest annual, Uncle John’s 24-KARAT GOLD Bathroom Reader. [pulls out wallet - flips through pictures - pulls one out] Here she is! Just look at her:

Is that the cutest baby you ever laid eyes on or what? Just look at that cute little head cap, and that sweet hinge, and that dear little tail…

Why “24-Karat-Gold”? Because this is the twenty-fourrth annual edition of Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader! And it’s worth it’s weight in gold! (Twenty-four years we’ve been doing this? Impossible…)

This baby is full to bursting with more than 500 pages of brand new bathroom-reading material. There’s little-known history, random origins, very weird news, myth-conceptions, mind-blowing science, flubbed headlines, urban legends, great quotations, and much, much more. A few article titles:

• Ancient Sub-urbs
• Canada’s Captain Underpants
• Helen Keller: Vaudeville Star
• How to Eavesdrop on Astronauts
• The ‘Umble Umbrella
• The Secrets of the Avocado
• What It’s All about (the Hokey Pokey, that is)
• Failed Amendments
• Knotty Buoy 
• Law & Scandal (the worst police scandals in U.S. history)
• Bill Murray Stories 

We’ve provided excerpts to a few of the stories you’ll find in the book - Font(s) of Knowledge, Forbidden Island, USA, and Self-Surgery - and there will be more of those coming in the coming weeks.

Uncle John’s 24-Karat-Gold Bathroom Reader is available right here, right now – and it’s 30% off, as part of our annual HOLIDAY SALE. (All of our books are 30% off, as a matter of fact – and there’s free shipping on orders of $35 or more.)

Thanks for reading, thanks for the time, thanks for being a fan, and here, wait [pulls out wallet again, flips through pictures, takes one out], take another look at her – isn’t she the cutest little baby you ever saw? Isn’t she?