EASIEST CONTEST EVER…
October 19, 2012
CONTEST CLOSED!!
WINNERS WILL BE ANNOUNCED SOON!
* * * *
How to enter this contest: by leaving a comment on this blog post saying “Hi,” or “Wattup?” or “Urkel’s bicycle stole my pajamas!” or whatever else you’d like to say.
How to win: by winning. (Er – by having your name picked in a random drawing of all comments.)
What you win: The brand-spanking new Uncle John’s Fully Loaded 25th Anniversary Bathroom Reader! 608 pages of BRAND NEW bathroom-reading BLISS!
Ain’t she purty?
• ONE entry per person.
• U.S. residents only. We’re sorry we’re sorry we’re sorry we’re sorry. You would not believe how complex and legally treacherous international laws are regarding simple contests like this. (We’re sorry.)
• You have until Monday, October 22, noon West-Coast time.
Good luck!
Share and Enjoy
Wattup. Wow, this IS an easy contest.
Shiny!
Biggest fan of BRI ever
If I don’t win this, I’ll… I’ll… well, I will be very sad and cranky!!! Just a warning!
Love the madness!!!
Going to the movies? I noticed you picking your seat. Now pick me to win.
That’s what she said…
Sitting on the throne Reading a BR!
My hovercraft is full of eels.
Smile!
Happy 25th Anniversary! lol
Outta my way chicken!
What up FUZZ NUT???
Hey, I’m saying hi even though I’m not from the US. ‘Cause you apologized so much you came across as a fellow Canadian!
I love the Bathroom Reader series!
That means a very lot to us, Meredith. We HATE that we can’t include you guys. Thanks for saying hi anyway!
How are your feet?
Uncle John and I gave birth at the same time. He to awesome books, and I to an awesome daughter!
Uncle John’s Bathroom Readers are the best books ever!!
Uncle Johns, better than toilet paper!!!
Happy Anniversary! My wife and I celebrated 25 years this year, too.
Werewolf.bar mitzvah spooky scary. Boys becoming men. Men becoming wolves!
HEEEEELLLLLLOOOOOOO BATHROOM READER!
I love your books! Only thing I collect now, I have 41 and want more!!
Spam is the breakfast of champions
cheeseball
Hi! Hellooooo! Gimmie Gimmie Gimmie! Need more reading on the John!
3 oxen and 7 of my crew died trying to get me to a computer to post this. 17 more fell ill of dysentery. We lost 2 ATVs and poor Toby will never walk again. At least 2 of the Sherpas still have both of their legs, though. The entire trip cost $76,348 plus possibly another $17,500,000 in legal fees and settlements to the families of the deceased/maimed. Easy contest, indeed! If I don’t win that book, the expedition will have been a total loss!
So the doctor said… you win!
Wow! 25 years congrats.
Caribou are practically unsinkable
Can’t wait to get this one! (Free or not!)
Howdey-doo BRI!
SHWING! I have the military bathroom reader on my bathroom counter right now… this might take a while.
Love reading Uncle John’s
Monkees go bananas
I like to read.
I’ll never be able to poop again without this book!!!
Hi-ho, Uncle Johnereeno!!
Thank you, Uncle John, for making me feel smarter than other people for more than 20 years now.
Ooooh. Pick me, choose me, love me!!! That is my comment and an obscure tv qoute. It’s like your books. Its a quest to find the ransom and obscure and funny. (No sherpas were harmed in the creation of this post.)
Please may I have a book. Thank you!
Cheaper and way more fun than a laxative!
Love to win this for my sister so she can see how awesome it is. I already have mine.
Awesome! I love the BRI!
Urkel did not steal my pajamas. He stole my Bathroom Reader!
Hi!!!
Pick me! Pick me!!
Did you know that Baltimore Orioles pitcher Hoyt Wilhelm once entered a game on August 6, 1959 (against the White Sox), in the 9th inning as a relief pitcher and proceeded to pitch 8 2/3 innings of no-hit ball before Billy Goodman hit a single off of him in the 17th inning? The 18-inning game ended in a 1-1 tie. White Sox starting pitcher Billy Pierce pitched 16 innings with Turk Lown relieving him for the final two innings. Orioles starter Billy O’Dell pitched 8 innings with Wilhelm hurling the final 10 innings. Two teams, 18-inning game, only 4 pitchers used.
Now is that trivia or what?
Love the Bathroom Readers, can’t wait to see the newest one.
25th anniversary, super sweet!!!
PICK ME!! PICK ME!! I ♥ UNCLE JOHNS!! =)
Love BRI, who doesn’t? LOL
I would be willing to bet that the following has never been said by any person in history…. “I think it would be fun to be dipped in lava followed by having crows peck out my eyeballs and hooking a car battery to my crotch!”
Gacchapon
Yo yo yo
MOST OF MY KNOWLEDGE COMES FROM MY VALUABLE TIME SPENT IN THAT SPECIAL ROOM READING UNCLE JOHN. THANK YOU.
OMG My husband would love this. I get an Uncle Johns Bathroom reader EVERY year for Christmas. It’s his favorite Read on the Can. LOL!!
How’s it rolling?
I’ve never counted my eyebrow hairs
I wanna win!
i never win crap
I am currently watching My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic. I am half way through an attempt to watch all 52 episode in a row, 19 hours worth.
Hi, or wattup
What’s green and has wheels?
A frog. I lied about the wheels.
I want this book for my collection of Uncle John’s Bathroom Readers!!!
Howdy to my favorite Uncle, John
I absolutely LOVE Uncle Johns, it is a great conversation starter!
Winner winner chicken dinner!!
25th anniversary. That’s good!
Ohh Yeah
someone just licked my eyeball!
ok, I’m gonna pick this; “Urkel’s bicycle stole my pajamas!”
Bow Chica Wow Wow
I hate waiting! I’m sooooo impatient! Just say i’m the winner cuz I’m awesome like that!
Hi, or whassup!
[Hope that makes me a winner! LOVE your books!!]
Come through for me, Uncle John!
Your Nephew
Todays my birthday so I should win.
Hi
Bathroom readers are the best
Is it raining, is it snowing
Is a hurricane a-blowing
I want to win
Go Ducks!
Buster Posey for PRESIDENT!!
Hey there, Amity!
Also, happy birthday to my dearest, on the twenty-second of October,
J.L.G.
But I just bought the book!!!! That’s ok, anytime I put it down, I have hi go steal it back from my daughter.
The Aliens who have abducted me said they will release me for a copy of the Fully Loaded 25th Anniversary bathroom reader…PLEASE HELP….there’s no bathroom suitable for humans on this spaceship…..
Afghanistan bananastand.
Are we there yet?
Are we there yet?
Are we there yet?
I’
Hi
Opa!!
Hola! Hi! Hello! Aloha! Greetings! Salutations! Take me to your leader!
U guys rock!!!!
Bacon should be a food group.
Pudding!
I’ve never smelled a smell like that smell smelled.
Love the bathroom readers! Can’t wait for the new one!
These are by far my favorite books
Watching things explode and eating popcorn… Friday night in Clackamas county.
Love ‘em, read them all the time.
I love Bathroom Readers, have shelves full!
My wife say I’m the king of useless knowledge. I owe it all to uncle johns bathroom reader.
I love you uncle john!!!!!!!
I’ve been a “non-stop” fan since I started reading a 10th Anniversary edition at my What’s house! It was an extended visit!!
That would be aunt, darn this spell checker!
Total Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader addict. Most of the awesome information cluttering up my brain is courtesy of the BRI – THANK YOU!
Been reading UJ since 1st edition, why does Wikipedia not have an UJBR page??????
Regan: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Uncle_John's_Bathroom_Reader
I bought two zebras and tamed a parrot named ” Mr. Future.”
Uncle Johns, 25 years of dropping knowledge bombs.
Please Excuse MY Dear Aunt Sally (she farted and doesn’t want anybody to know)
Woo 25th anniversary!
Pick me! Pick me!
Number 2
Yay I wanna win!
Love the toilet time page turner
WOOHOO! D’oh!
I wanna say something clever and funny here, but my brain went nightnight
I went to the circus last night… It was intense (in tents, get it?)
Good looking cover!
Over. There is really no other choice.
I’d be smarter if it wasn’t for grape flavored paint chips….
Wouldn’t even mind winning a copy of the 24-karat BR. Got duplicate of one of the other volumes last year, but by time I got to Costco to exchange one for the 24-Karat issue, they had already removed them from sale.
The clown has NO penis.
Best quote…. ” thats what she said.”
Wish me luck, everybody.
Happy Halloween!!!
One of the best trivia reference. Full of information on different subjects.
A dingo ate my Bathroom Reader.
When I found out that Congress was going to archive every Tweet ever I decided to set up an account and chronicle my bowel movements.
Hi! My kids are begging for more Kids Only Bathroom Readers.
If you’re thinkin’ you’re too cool to boogie
Boy oh boy have I got news for you
Everybody here tonight must boogie
Let me tell ya’ you are no exception to the rule
The only thing I want more than the next bathroom reader is an online index for them! I keep remembering articles that I want to re-read or share with someone, and then I have to go through 20+ books in three rooms of my house…come on!
the sea monkeys have my money.
At any given time there are more than 373,268 people on the toilet in the continental United States. 83.2% have some sort of reading material and, of those, 92.7% are reading an Uncle John’s bathroom reader.
trousers
Did you hear that? It’s the world’s smallest violin…
The most fun you can have with your pants around your ankles.
I could have a degree in random trivia thanks to the hours of commodious contemplation your books have given me…
My husband spends way too much time in the bathroom … at least he’s learning while he’s in there.
Great things to read while giving your brains a rest! :0)
Oh, how I love my big books of information and trivia
Yay yellow duckies .. 25th anniversary..
Good afternoon
Thank goodness I have a large bathroom for my complete bathroom reader collection!!
Fully loaded huh? Not gonna go there!!
Uncle John’s Bathroom Readers: Wonderful books that take up half my bookshelf and I must’ve dropped about 300 dollars on. Thank you so much!
Well its either LOTTO or this….good luck to me I suppose…..
ducks are funny
I need new reading material in the bathroom. Hook me up please!
did you know that if you put dryer sheets in your pants it makes your farts smell good
o hai
Sure hope I can add this one to my collection!!!
QUE PASA MIJO!?!?!?!??! LOVIN IT!!!!!!!!!!
Green beans are like flimsy toenails
I believe in Sherlock Holmes!
I really like these and I need more reading material, so.
I know a song that gets on everybody nerves, I know a song that gets on everybodys nerves, I know a song that gets on everybody nerves, and this is how it goes!
This is good enough.
I like old music. There, I said something.
Hullo. Great stuff you guys write, keep it up!
ps, Any hope to get a WWI/WWII/combination UJBR in the future? That’d be pretty awesome, just saying…
Have you seen Armed Forces? It’s over on the right there….
I have, but I like WWI/WWII in particular…
i like turtles
OMG ME TOO!…WHAT A COINCIDENCE :O
I ate fish sticks for supper.
I love the smell of my brand. Don’t you?
Oh, Please…. please…. please….. let’s give a binder-less woman a break and let me win this awesome book!!!!!!!!!
I stand outside myself, watching myself, watching myself. I smile, I smile, I smile.
Iloveyourbookaandwanttowinthisone. Thankyou. B O B
I’d wanna win if I could read.
Pick me, I need some new BR material!!
Pick me…Pick me!
Hey…my birthdays the 21st and this would be one heck of a present:)
P.s. KEEP ON FLUSHIN!
That was easy!
I’ve been waiting for another Uncle John contest! Sweet!
Can’t wait for Each New Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader! Great reading in Any Room!
It’s gonna be a long winter in VT – need the new Uncle John’s in the john to see us through!
I’m watching Hocus Pocus right now. The best Halloween movie of all time.
Keep on flushin’.
I sure hope this isn’t a bazinga!
Hi! Love the books!
How many boards
Could the Mongols hoard
If the Mongol hordes got bored?
What’s black, white, and red all over? A penguin with a sunburn.
I like turtles.
#HAILSTATE
I like turtles.
Damn you, Dan. Damn you.
Love your books!
Hello!
More fun than socks on a rooster.
MeMeMe!
thank you for your books……i really really enjoy them.
whats shakin bacon
Why not (V) (;,,,:) (V)
I am posting a comment….lol…want to win this book
Awesome books!! My favorite thing to read while taking a bath!!
Want it, need it, gotta have it….pleeeeaaaaassssseee!
hey
Hi. You’re right, that was easy.
Have you seen my pants? They are nowhere to be found!
HOW MANY ELEPHANTS CAN YOU FIT IN A MINI-COOPER?
Four. Two in the front. Two in the back.
HOW MANY GIRAFFES CAN YOU FIT IN A MINI-COOPER?
None. The elephants are already there.
HOW DO YOU KNOW THERE’S AN ELEPHANT IN YOUR FRIDGE?
There’s a fingerprint in the butter.
HOW DO YOU KNOW THERE’S TWO ELEPHANTS IN YOUR FRIDGE?
They giggle when the lights go out.
HOW DO YOU KNOW THERE’S THREE ELEPHANTS IN YOUR FRIDGE?
You can’t quite close the door.
HOW DO YOU KNOW THERE’S FOUR ELEPHANTS IN YOUR FRIDGE?
There’s a Mini-Cooper parked outside!
Homcoming sucked. Please make my night better.
My Chihuahua shakes a LOT. And, her feet smell like Fritos!!
Coolest contest ever! Want to win so I can read my new baby all sorts of useful (someday) knowledge.
Lucky I was able to get out of the loo in time to enter.
pots stop racecar a toyota racecar pots stop
Pablo. That is all.
YO, I LOVE BATHROOM READER!
Hi
Just wanted u to know that right now I feel superior. Well at least for a few minutes
… so now I understand why seeing her hairdresser ending up costing that lady in California her life, but I still don’t understand why she needed somebody to play the bagpipes.
I like cheese.
Oooh! I want!
A baby stole my dingo.
I love Uncle John’s bathroom readers!
Hello
)
winning (please?)
Pediatricians are men of little patients
Aliens stole my husband’s skin
Hop scotch
I really wanted to think of something funny and eye catching to say in hopes of it raising my chances at winning but then I realized in a random drawing that it wouldn’t matter what I said. I decided on not only sharing that with you but I also wanted to say one more thing. I love these books, I remember the first one I ever read was an old beaten up, well used copy of the ” 16th Edition Unstoppable ” that my mom got for me at a garage sale when I was sick and unable to go out and do anything. The book made me laugh so much and even educated me on several things. I didn’t care about being sick anymore. So thanks for making such amazing, educational, and hilarious books and I hope you continue to be a success for many many years to come.
Poo
I can’t believe I’ve spent 25 years reading your books…………ahhhhhhhh the good ole days.
Gimme gimme gimme…….Please.
uhh
The joystick factory is in full throttle.
Generic random comment.
Dont’ do something stupid while you’re doing something illegal.
Ba Weep Grana Weep Ninny Bong
OMG… A New Bathroom Reader. The Throne Room Just got More FUN!
I would love to win this book. woot woot
Read all the rest, need more!
I like turtles.
Sweet!!
May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your doorstep!
BOO
Yellow and blue make green!
Pick me, pick me, pick me.
Congratulations.
You have just discovered the secret message.
Please send your answer to Old Pink, care of the Funny Farm, Chalfont…
Roger! Carolyne’s on the phone!
Okay.
We love Bathroom Readers!
I love reading & sharing Uncle John’s Bathroom Readers. You tickle my brain and digestive system every day.
I got really long and nice legs!
A comment.
Walking Dead is on…
To be, or not to be, that is the question:
Whether ’tis Nobler in the mind to suffer
The Slings and Arrows of outrageous Fortune,
Or to take Arms against a Sea of troubles,
Am I even eligible? I birthed a writer.
Wasssssssupppppppppppppp!
One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got into my pajamas I’ll never know
remember who you are, and don’t let that get you down!
Just imagine an otter in a dounut eating toast enough said.
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