“Irrational Deer. Looks like it was dancing.”
June 27, 2012
Do you need a new book? Of course you do! And wow! What a coincidence – we’ve got a brand new one out right now: Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader NATURE CALLS! Here’s a quick look inside:
Actual police reports involving actual animals—and several trees—all
from the area around Buffalo, New York. (Maybe it’s the name?)
- A Harlem Road resident reported that the house had been hit with paint balls for the second time in a week. Police said it appeared to be bird droppings.
- A Midway resident reported a “suspicious looking” fox in a field behind their home. The resident worried that it might be chasing rabbits.
- A man reported he went to get his car from a Genesee Street parking lot when he lost his 13-year-old son. Reportedly the youth saw a spider, panicked, and was hiding somewhere in the lot. He was located.
- A motorist traveling on Ellicott Road complained of an irrational deer. Looks like it was dancing.
- An elderly resident reported a bird in the house on Kensington Avenue. The resident was advised to open windows and doors, however it was determined there was a dead battery in a smoke detector and there was no bird.
- A bird was reported in a house on South Avenue. Patrols 4, 7, & 9 responding.
- Officers received a complaint of suspicious activity on Fourth Avenue. A man was reported hugging several trees.
- Troopers investigated an accident on Clarence Center Road. Car #1 stopped to avoid a turtle. The driver of car #1 said car #2 drove into the back end of car #1. The driver of car #2 said the driver of car #1 stopped to avoid the turtle in the road and then backed up, hitting car #2. Troopers said the turtle was unable to offer any information.
There is so much more! The search for the mysterious rhinoceros dolphin; the different categories of waterfalls; a story about a guy who licks snapping turtles’ eyeballs; how to poop outdoors—and so much more! You can get it all in Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader NATURE CALLS! Get two – your cat might want one!
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